Later, folks

Later, folks

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Thanks for all the fish...

Back in 2009, I had graduated college with my art degree and the economy was shit, so I wasn't finding work. My husband and I liked to play around with taking sexy photos, and on a whim we threw some up on a German website called My Dirty Hobby. It was fun! I'd get to suck his cock, he film it, and we'd post the results on MDH. Then I got a check and thought, "Shit, it's better than waiting tables!" 

So I joined some modeling sites, and went on my first shoot. I was super nervous, but I got paid to get naked and play with my pussy. The photographer wanted to know if I'd do more the second time, and I agreed as long as my husband was involved. I got paid again, AND got my first DP and first MMF three way. Before long, a friend of mine who was also modeling and I were signed up with an agent in LA and right after Thanksgiving, I flew out to LA and got my first test shots done... But I got no work. I met some fun people, but it was a bust. I went back in January though, and that time I met Billy Watson who shot for Dogfart's websites and Mr. POV (his own site). It was a great time! I was in a couple DVDs, some websites, and I switched agents because the first one was a loser (he's out of business). My new agent wasn't much better though, and after couple more agent switches, a good time with Lee Bang and Sophie Dee, and the weird murder of a guy I had just befriended and shot with by a psycho I'd also shot with, I was pretty much done with LA (I still love the city though). 

I also flew out to NYC a few times and met great people like Jupaman, Lavender Rayne, and Mike from Monster Models. There was also the hellish time I had in Jersey, but that's a story in another blog. Kink and Princess Donna, whom I adore even now, flew me out to San Francisco a couple of shoots that I had the BEST time shooting with James Deen and Mr. Pete, and I flew out to Orlando once to work with Naughty Alysha, who was already something of a hero of mine, and she launched my own site. 

For years, I booked my own shoots, fucked who I wanted, and made a modest income. I went to swinger parties and gang bangs with my husband, still do in fact (as many of you know), and did my art on the side. I taught painting classes, had a successful Etsy store that was even featured in Wired Magazine, and I sold paintings when I could. Somewhere in there, my daughter started school at age 3. She skipped a grade and was in a kind of lousy school, so I went in to volunteer to see what was going on. Working as a volunteer to a brand new teacher, I learned a lot, and I fell in love with a calling. That was the beginning of the end. I started grad school, and I just finished...

My rules in my marriage have always been about equality. If either of us fucks someone else, we bring the other pictures, stories, or we are actually there. Honest communication is why we work. Today I'm telling you I'm getting out of the porn biz. Twitter, Tumblr, and several other sites are gone. It's been fun, and I'm still going to be a raging slut, and pics and video will still get made, though mostly just for my, my husband's, and our girlfriend's consumption. I appreciate all the support and love through the years! It's been fun, but so long...

Clayra Beau

Monday, December 6, 2010

A Hard City Indeed.

As many of you know I just returned from a trip out to The Big Apple. It has been hectic with the Thanksgiving holiday and I finally have time to finish telling the story of my adventures there.  Let me preface by saying that 90% of the trip was wonderful. There were some rough parts but we will get to that.

I landed at JFK around 6pm on Tuesday evening and in true Clayra style I hit the bricks running. I went straight from the airport to my first shoot with SHM Productions for their site It was a very laid back solo scene. I really hit it off with the people there and I think I have made from friends for life. How can I not love someone who geeks out about my plans to make a crochet Cthulu hat?  After the shoot the photographer rode with me to Times Square. I had never been on a train in NYC so that was pretty damn cool. When I got back to the place I was staying I was starving and was amazed that in NYC you can order sushi for delivery at midnight. Sushi for the win!

The next morning I had to take the train out to New Jersey and do a shoot in Philadelphia with Blue Moon Productions. On my way to the train station I saw a lot of tagging on walls and garage doors but I had to stop and snap a pic of pedobear sprayed on an overheard door.  My first shoot in Philly was a BJ scene. Not a big deal you say? Yeah, it was an hour and a half long BJ! My jaw hurts just thinking about it. By the by, a bit of advice to anyone who ever wants a girl to go down there, shave your balls. Hairy, fuzzy or stubbly balls are a girls worst enemy when she is rubbing her face there. Just think about whether you would want to rub your face on that before you get out of the shower everyday. Just something to keep in mind. The next scene in Philly was for a site with the premise that I am a high schooler auditioning to be on an amateur adult video site. Throughout this 'audition' I change into several different outfits from a cute cheerleader to a Christmas teddy and finally a very clingy naughty nurse outfit. It was an interesting shoot to say the least.

I got back to the City at about 8pm and went out for more sushi. There is something very fulfilling about a spicy tuna roll that just doesn't compare to anything else.  After dinner I got dolled up and headed off to my next shoot. It was also in Manhattan so I didn't have to travel far to get there. I was shooting with a great guy named Walter and the shoot was supposed to be a B/G scene with some pretty girl photos and take maybe 2 hours. It took almost 4 hours because I got into a fight with him. Nothing horrible but when you state that the X-Men are not only cooler than Batman but the entire DC Universe, I have to geek smack you back into place. then the whole Marvel vs. DC argument started. " Do you think that Batman could really kick the Hulk's ass?" "Hello he took down Superman. I think he can handle the Hulk." :)  I also had to revoke his nerd card for never having read a single Vertigo comic or knowing who Alan Moore was. Tisk tisk. So by the time I finished defending Batman's honor I got home and fell straight to sleep with visions of Harley Quinn choking out Jubilee running through my head.

Thursday my day started a little bit later. Mike from Monsterfilmz picked me up at 10am. We went over to a hotel clearly meant for partying to film a scene with Johnny Slim. We had to change rooms 3 times because all of the rooms had mirrors on the ceiling and walls and that just doesn't work for filming.  And there was even a bottle opener already mounted on the wall next to the door. So shooting porn here was probably not an odd thing for this hotel.  Johnny was awesome to work with. we joked around a lot and shot the shit and made a really awesome scene. After that was done Mike and I headed up to the Ravel in Queens to do a G/G scene with Indigo. Talk about a sexy women. I do love a woman with tats but she had a 42 on her back and a Gonzo tat on her rib and I was hooked. Definitely a fun and very hot scene. Thanks to Indigo for coming on such short notice.

Then the shit started. I was headed to a shoot with Facial Abuse. I had done my research and looked at the site. It look pretty damn rough but I was reassured it would be fine. Because of traffic I got there a little late. After I got my makeup done and got dressed everything was put on hold while we waited for the camera guy to show up. In that time I signed my contract and took some photos on set. Just before we started shooting I had to ask the producer to show me the male talents STD tests before we started which was met with some sighing and the tests. Shady for sure. At that point I just wanted to get done. when the camera guy finally arrived at midnight we started shooting. My plan was to try and get through as much of the scene as possible before taking a break. The fewer breaks, the sooner I could get a burger and pass out. Once we started I didn't even make it for 2 minutes before I had to stop. I started on my knees with the male talent literally shoving their cocks down my throat until I gagged an couldn't breath.
I had to break because I was ready to pass out. when we started again it was no easier. I was still on my knees an the guys were so aggressive that at one point I literally had to stand up and push with all of my strength to get off of him. there is no point in having a safe word when you can't talk. I was clawing at their legs and slapping their thighs and they still wouldn't let up.  So I took another breather and now I had 5 minutes of footage under my belt.  After my break one of the guys picked me up and threw me over his shoulder and shoved me on him again. Then they pulled me off by my hair and smacked me in the face so hard it gave me a bloody nose. they didn't even notice that I was bleeding until they threw me onto the couch and started throat fucking me while my head hung off the couch. the guy jumped off and was like dude you have a bloody nose! That will look great on camera! I took another break and cleaned up my face and had some water. As I was sitting on the couch I noticed that I was having trouble seeing straight. One eye was looking one way and the other looked straight. So not cool. We started again with me leaning off the couch again and again I had to shove the guys off of me with all my might to be able to breath. I even threw myself on the floor to get away and they picked me back up, dropped me on the couch and kept going. finally I called for a break and took off for the dressing room. I was so done being abused. I was literally shaking and my brain was no longer in the just get through the
scene mode. It was very fight or flight and I could not go on anymore. After a quick call home and a cigarette, some people tried to comfort me and get me to finish the scene. I'm sorry but there was no amount anyone could pay me at this point to keep me going. After another minute to gather myself I walked back on set and said I was tapping out. They told me that they had about enough footage that they could sell it if they got the popshot so I sat on the floor and finished the scene. For all of that they paid me $200. I packed up my clothes and headed back to the city. I was so shook up I was crying on the way home too. I literally could not even swallow my soda. Those are the facts take them as you like.  when I got back to NYC at 4am I was so exhausted I ate 4 Sun chips and fell asleep.

The next morning I was crazy sore and was still having trouble swallowing but I wanted to have some better memories to take home so I walked around the fashion district with a friend of mine. It was great to see some of the city before I let and went back to Wisconsin. Of course I had to deal with Delta being retarded on the way back but after the night before, it was all peaches and cream.

The stuff that happened to me should never happen to anyone so I would suggest a boycott of this site. With my shoot with Kink I knew I had people there that actually had my back and were doing it all for show. FA is all about hurting women as much as they can and getting away with it. One of the clauses in their contracts says that you can not come back to them for any physical or emotional damages caused during you shoot. Therefore they could literally fuck a girl up for life and she can do nothing about it. It's a typical clause but they really use it to their advantage.

I came home to my family and wonderful fans curious to know how it went. I posted several updates about what happened but that is the full story. After that I really needed to do something a bit calmer so I did a local workshop with some local photographers. It was a laid back Christmas shoot just west of Milwaukee. It felt really great to be more in control of my environment and what was going on around me. The pics turned out great even though I was really worried about the bruising on my eyes. Yay for sexy Christmas!

Thank you to everyone for your support and letting me tell me story.  Have a wonderful and safe holiday season everyone and I will talk to you again real soon,

Clayra Beau